Title: The Experiment
Author: Rebecca Raine
Genre: M/M Romance
Release Date: August 17, 2020
Cover Design: Bec Rivers
When a single kiss calls your sexuality into question, there’s only one sure path to a reliable answer: further research.
Patrick
I like to think I know myself outside and in. As a developmental psychologist, I’ve spent years exploring the true foundations of my identity. So, when losing a bet means kissing my best friend, Logan, I already know I’m going to hate every second of it. All the relevant questions regarding my sexuality were asked and answered years ago. The results were conclusive: despite the odd same-sex attraction, I dislike being touched by men.
That is, it seems, until Logan is the man doing the touching. The intense desire aroused by his kiss contradicts all my expectations and I have no idea how to integrate the new information. Thankfully, I know exactly how to uncover the truth about myself—once and for all.
Logan
I’ve put a lot of effort into keeping Patrick out of my fantasies and in the friend-zone. Our recent lip-lock may have unleashed my feelings for him temporarily, but I’ll get them back on their platonic track in no time. Falling for a friend, especially a sexually ambivalent friend, is a one-way ticket to heartache.
But, when the unforeseen impact of our kiss inspires Patrick to conduct an experiment into the extent of his bisexuality, I can’t resist volunteering to help. If any man is going to join Patrick on his journey of self-discovery, it’s sure as hell going to be me.
“You can do your experiment with me.”
My heart pounds, as I wait for him to respond to my offer. The part of me that’s sure he’ll say yes is already weak with relief that he won’t go out looking for anyone else. I don’t want other men touching Patrick. If he’s only ever going to do this experiment with one man, I want that man to be me.
“I thought you wanted to go back to the way things were.” His gaze is wary, and he has yet to move a muscle. “We’re friends, nothing more. That’s what you said.”
“Yes, and it’s still true,” I assure him. “I do want to go back to being friends. But we can do it after the experiment.”
His breath has quickened and, when he speaks again, his voice is rough. “Are you sure you want to do this?”
“It’s the best viable solution,” I tell him, as if coating my possessiveness with a thick layer of pragmatism will make it less obvious. “Don’t forget, it was my kiss that breathed life into your queerness.” My body reacts to the idea of doing it again… and again… and again. However many times he needs to be satisfied. I make a show of licking my lips, enjoying the way he watches with rapt attention. “How much do you want to bet I can get more than a boner out of you?”
With a start, his eyes narrow and he points a finger at me. “No more bets.”
Laughing out loud, I nod. “That’s right. How could I forget?”
He runs a hand over the back of his neck as he looks around the bar, before returning his gaze to me. “I’ll admit, when I decided to do this, my first instinct was to come to you.” He gestures at me with an impatient hand. “You’re the only guy I’ve ever enjoyed kissing and it totally blew my mind. Why do you think I’m doing this in the first place?” he growls, his frustration coming through. “It’s not just because of what happened when we kissed. It’s the fact I can’t stop thinking about it.”
He’s not the only one. I’ve rubbed my cock raw in remembrance. The urge to shove him back against the nearby wall washes over me. I want to give him something new to think about. Ignoring the impulse, I swallow hard and speak in a low voice. “When you’re thinking about it, are these analytical thoughts about what it all means? Or are they wanking thoughts?”
He glances away, trying to appear nonchalant. “Both.”
My muscles tighten at the thought of him with his hand wrapped around his throbbing dick, fantasising about kissing me while he pants and moans his way to orgasm. I want to know what he looks like when he comes. What he sounds like. How he feels.
“But,” he says, with emphasis, interrupting the lustfest going on in my head, “I decided against it because I know you don’t—” The words cut off and his eyes close briefly. “I don’t want us to stop being friends.”
“I don’t want that either but, Patrick, you’re playing with fire here and assuming no one will steal the matches. I’m the only one I trust to do this right.”
He’s still reluctant. I can feel the force of his doubts. But he hasn’t said no.
“Patrick, listen to me.” I slide a hand around the back of his neck, urging him to meet my gaze. “You need someone you can trust to stop when you say stop, no matter what’s happening when you say it. Someone who won’t get pissed at you and accuse you of being a tease when you leave them with blue balls.” Releasing him, I grin. “Besides, you tried looking for someone else to kiss. It didn’t work. You chose me and now you’re stuck with me for the duration.”
He huffs out an indignant sound. “I could find someone else to kiss,” he blusters, “if I looked really hard… for about ten years.”
I laugh out loud, knowing I almost have him convinced. “Yeah, but even if you did, it wouldn’t matter.”
“Why is that?” He leans closer, as if he’s looking forward to my response.
In that instant, I realise how badly I want this—him. I want to tug on every thread of his sexuality, freeing each strand for thorough inspection. I want to tie him in knots, before making him unravel for me. And I want him to know, every second along the way, I’m the one who is doing this to him. That I’m the only man to ever make him feel this way.
Licking my lips, I take a step closer and bring my face in next to his. “Because even if you did hit your limit with someone else, you’d always wonder how much further I could have taken you.” I lower my head, so he can feel my breath against his neck as I go in for the kill. “Patrick, my friend, I’m going to drag your arse so far down my end of the spectrum, you’ll have to claw your way straight.”
My heart pounds, as I wait for him to respond to my offer. The part of me that’s sure he’ll say yes is already weak with relief that he won’t go out looking for anyone else. I don’t want other men touching Patrick. If he’s only ever going to do this experiment with one man, I want that man to be me.
“I thought you wanted to go back to the way things were.” His gaze is wary, and he has yet to move a muscle. “We’re friends, nothing more. That’s what you said.”
“Yes, and it’s still true,” I assure him. “I do want to go back to being friends. But we can do it after the experiment.”
His breath has quickened and, when he speaks again, his voice is rough. “Are you sure you want to do this?”
“It’s the best viable solution,” I tell him, as if coating my possessiveness with a thick layer of pragmatism will make it less obvious. “Don’t forget, it was my kiss that breathed life into your queerness.” My body reacts to the idea of doing it again… and again… and again. However many times he needs to be satisfied. I make a show of licking my lips, enjoying the way he watches with rapt attention. “How much do you want to bet I can get more than a boner out of you?”
With a start, his eyes narrow and he points a finger at me. “No more bets.”Laughing out loud, I nod. “That’s right. How could I forget?”
He runs a hand over the back of his neck as he looks around the bar, before returning his gaze to me. “I’ll admit, when I decided to do this, my first instinct was to come to you.” He gestures at me with an impatient hand. “You’re the only guy I’ve ever enjoyed kissing and it totally blew my mind. Why do you think I’m doing this in the first place?” he growls, his frustration coming through. “It’s not just because of what happened when we kissed. It’s the fact I can’t stop thinking about it.”
He’s not the only one. I’ve rubbed my cock raw in remembrance. The urge to shove him back against the nearby wall washes over me. I want to give him something new to think about. Ignoring the impulse, I swallow hard and speak in a low voice. “When you’re thinking about it, are these analytical thoughts about what it all means? Or are they wanking thoughts?”
He glances away, trying to appear nonchalant. “Both.”
“But,” he says, with emphasis, interrupting the lustfest going on in my head, “I decided against it because I know you don’t—” The words cut off and his eyes close briefly. “I don’t want us to stop being friends.”
“I don’t want that either but, Patrick, you’re playing with fire here and assuming no one will steal the matches. I’m the only one I trust to do this right.”
He’s still reluctant. I can feel the force of his doubts. But he hasn’t said no.
“Patrick, listen to me.” I slide a hand around the back of his neck, urging him to meet my gaze. “You need someone you can trust to stop when you say stop, no matter what’s happening when you say it. Someone who won’t get pissed at you and accuse you of being a tease when you leave them with blue balls.” Releasing him, I grin. “Besides, you tried looking for someone else to kiss. It didn’t work. You chose me and now you’re stuck with me for the duration.”
I laugh out loud, knowing I almost have him convinced. “Yeah, but even if you did, it wouldn’t matter.”
“Why is that?” He leans closer, as if he’s looking forward to my response.
In that instant, I realise how badly I want this—him. I want to tug on every thread of his sexuality, freeing each strand for thorough inspection. I want to tie him in knots, before making him unravel for me. And I want him to know, every second along the way, I’m the one who is doing this to him. That I’m the only man to ever make him feel this way.
Licking my lips, I take a step closer and bring my face in next to his. “Because even if you did hit your limit with someone else, you’d always wonder how much further I could have taken you.” I lower my head, so he can feel my breath against his neck as I go in for the kill. “Patrick, my friend, I’m going to drag your arse so far down my end of the spectrum, you’ll have to claw your way straight.”
What is the biggest influence/interest that brought you to this genre?
The first MM Romance book I ever read was Shifting Gears by Riley Hart. It was published around the same time as my first MMF Romance, Our Little Secret. The two books were neighbours on a bestseller list for a while. I had never read an MM Romance before (only MMF) and I never planned to write one. But there was something about the cover of Shifting Gears that sucked me in every time I saw it. Eventually, I gave in and bought a copy. I loved it so much! I’ve been reading MM Romance ever since and, eventually, began to write them, too. It was like I finally found the place where I fit, and I never looked back.
When writing a book, what is your favorite part of the creative process(outline, plot, character names, editing, etc)?
Re-writing. I find the initial drafting process to be terribly difficult, but when I’m rewriting I get to play so much more. I’ll spend whole mornings refining paragraphs. I’ll go over conversations between the characters over and over, digging deeper into what they’re saying and not saying. That slow process of polishing what’s already there is, for me, the most enjoyable part of writing.
When reading a book, what genre do you find most interesting/intriguing?
Romance is my favourite genre, and I definitely read more MM Romance than anything else these days. I love books with characters who have to struggle and work for their happy ever after. We all come to new relationship with past traumas and misbeliefs we have to work through. But falling in love changes us, it’s supposed to change us. Being present for that journey—when two (or more) people grow and become more complete for having met each other—is something I truly enjoy.
If you could co-author with any author, past or present, who would you choose?
That’s a tough one. I’ve never co-authored anything and I’m a total control freak so I’m not sure how easy I would be to work with. But… I’d love to hang out in a writing room with Jane Austen. She’d hate what I’d have our characters getting up to after dark.
Have you always wanted to write or did it come to you "later in life"?
I’ve been reading romance novels since I was sixteen, but it didn’t occur to me to write them until I was in my late twenties. My background is in psychology and I was happily working in that area when I first put pen to paper to try my hand at some fan fiction. Those first stories, written entirely while commuting on the bus, changed my life forever.
The first MM Romance book I ever read was Shifting Gears by Riley Hart. It was published around the same time as my first MMF Romance, Our Little Secret. The two books were neighbours on a bestseller list for a while. I had never read an MM Romance before (only MMF) and I never planned to write one. But there was something about the cover of Shifting Gears that sucked me in every time I saw it. Eventually, I gave in and bought a copy. I loved it so much! I’ve been reading MM Romance ever since and, eventually, began to write them, too. It was like I finally found the place where I fit, and I never looked back.
When writing a book, what is your favorite part of the creative process(outline, plot, character names, editing, etc)?
Re-writing. I find the initial drafting process to be terribly difficult, but when I’m rewriting I get to play so much more. I’ll spend whole mornings refining paragraphs. I’ll go over conversations between the characters over and over, digging deeper into what they’re saying and not saying. That slow process of polishing what’s already there is, for me, the most enjoyable part of writing.
When reading a book, what genre do you find most interesting/intriguing?
Romance is my favourite genre, and I definitely read more MM Romance than anything else these days. I love books with characters who have to struggle and work for their happy ever after. We all come to new relationship with past traumas and misbeliefs we have to work through. But falling in love changes us, it’s supposed to change us. Being present for that journey—when two (or more) people grow and become more complete for having met each other—is something I truly enjoy.
If you could co-author with any author, past or present, who would you choose?
That’s a tough one. I’ve never co-authored anything and I’m a total control freak so I’m not sure how easy I would be to work with. But… I’d love to hang out in a writing room with Jane Austen. She’d hate what I’d have our characters getting up to after dark.
Have you always wanted to write or did it come to you "later in life"?
I’ve been reading romance novels since I was sixteen, but it didn’t occur to me to write them until I was in my late twenties. My background is in psychology and I was happily working in that area when I first put pen to paper to try my hand at some fan fiction. Those first stories, written entirely while commuting on the bus, changed my life forever.
Rebecca is a long-time lover of all things romance. Whether it’s a book, movie, or real life, she will always have more fun if there’s a love interest thrown into the mix. She lives in Queensland, Australia with her very own hero husband, two quirky kids and one big, black dog. Other than reading and writing books, her favourite things include loud music, enjoying a glass of wine on the patio, organising everything in existence, and spending too much time on the Internet.
