Summary:
What would you do if you saw someone getting beaten up?
Have-a-go hero Barney really should have used his patented superpower—his Very Loud Scream—and not chanced his wobbly, faux bravado. Now he’s dodging a posse of angry yobs, his head reeling from more than the missile that just hit him. Just who is this stranger sprinting at his side?
By the time it’s safe for him and Raf to emerge from their refuge, there’s a definite connection between them. And yet there’s something about Raf’s story that doesn’t quite add up. Will Barney's I-dared-to-believe dreams go up in smoke or is this New Year’s Eve the one Where Forever Started?
I've featured a few of Barbara Elsborg's books on my blog but never had an opportunity to read them. After reading Where Forever Started, I will definitely be keeping my eye on future stories as well as checking out her backlist. Barney and Raf are just so darn loveable that one can't help but root for them to find their HEA. There are moments that will leave your heart hurting but you'll also feel immense joy. Everything a holiday novella should make you feel.
A sweet little gem that will make you smile and believe with just the right balance of drama, put together Where Forever Started will suck you in and when the last page is done, you are left longing for more. For me, that longing is a true sign of a great story.
RATING:
Summary:
No Shame #5
Indy and his chosen family are celebrating the holidays…in true No Shame style.
It’s time to say I do, and Indy couldn’t be more excited. Side by side with Noah, Josh, and Connor, he’s proud to take his vows with their friends watching.
But his post-wedding bliss is rudely interrupted when his past once again comes back to haunt him. And not just him, Connor gets some shocking news as well that leaves him reeling.
Before they can all share the best Christmas ever, they’ll need to come together as one family.
No Angel is the fifth book in the No Shame series, a continuing series that needs to be read in order (start with No Filter). You can expect the usual sexy shenanigans, some suspense, and a whole lotta love and emotions as we reconnect with all characters from the previous books.
Summary:
Crush #4
After Colton’s father died, his mother returned to her hometown of Cambridge, UK, leaving him to his life in New York. He’s happy, apart from only being able to see his mother once a year at Christmas. It’s during one visit, he meets Ioan, a carer, who lights him up like a Christmas tree. It makes the experience more special because Ioan understands how Colton feels when his mother doesn’t recognise him.
Ioan loves his job, but his heart breaks every time pain flares through Colton’s eyes, especially as he knows Colton’s time in the UK is short. When he gets the opportunity to visit New York, he doesn’t entertain the thought of bumping into Colton – after all, the city is enormous. When he meets up with him by chance, he tries to hide how happy he is, pushing down the feelings before they could escape.
The more time they steal together, the closer they become, but nothing can happen with three thousand miles between them. Ioan has experience of long-distance relationships, and he’ll never go there again.
Find out what happens when their decisions set them on a path of heartache and happiness.
Summary:
Must Love Dogs
Alex goes to a dog rescue with one mission: overcoming one of his fears. But he gets more than he bargained for when he unexpectedly bonds with a Jack Russell terrier named Rudolph and decides to take him home.
When shelter volunteer Luther offers to show Alex the ropes of dog ownership, their time together proves they have more in common than just Rudolph’s affection. But if they’re going to have a happy holiday, Alex needs to come to terms with his issues. Can Luther help him see that love really can be unconditional?
Mountain Springs Omegas #1
When Liam's Christmas plans are upended he decides to take his mom's advice and plan a friends' getaway at the family cabin.
Liam's loved his alpha best friend, Alex, ever since he presented as an omega, but he'd rather keep the other man in his life as a friend than scare him off as a lover. That doesn't keep him from wanting to spend every possible second with him, so he invites the alpha to help plan the getaway at the cabin.
Alex has loved his best friend Liam for years, but kept his attraction to the beautiful omega to himself.
Alex would like nothing more than to claim and breed his best friend, but doesn't want to risk losing the omega if the interest isn't mutual. So he hides his feelings. But that doesn't stop him from jumping at the opportunity to spend several days with the other man at the secluded mountain cabin.
Arriving several days ahead of the rest of the group, Liam and Alex set about readying the cabin for the holiday getaway, but a surprise heat in the middle of a snowstorm means they are forced to confront their emotions. Do they dare admit their mutual attraction, or do they attempt to fight their instincts?
Recipe for Romance
One Alpha
One Omega
10 Years Mutual Pining
One Cabin
One Snowstorm
One Heat
Mix well, garnish with peppermint hot chocolate.
Peppermint Kisses for the Omega is an 11.5K word , non-shifter, M/M, Mpreg romance, featuring two obvlivious men, some knotty fun, and plenty of peppermint hot chocolate.
Random Tales of Christmas 2022
Where Forever Started by Barbara Elsborg
1
Barney fastened his coat, slung his backpack over his shoulder and took a final look in the mirror. He forced a smile onto his face, the smile that had to be maintained at all costs once he reached his father’s, no matter how difficult he found it. Leaving his room, he double locked the door and turned to see Simon leaning against the wall opposite, hands in his pockets, staring at him. Barney lost his smile.
“Can’t you leave your door open?” Simon asked. “Give someone a place to crash. You’ve nothing worth nicking, if that’s what you’re worried about.”
Fuck you! “No, sorry.” Barney headed for the stairs. Why the hell had he added sorry? He wasn’t sorry. He might not have much worth stealing, but no way did he want to come back to a trashed room or dirty sheets.
“You could share with me.” Simon called after him and laughed.
Been there, done it once, and never again. Simon’s version of fun was very different to his. It was both worrying and irritating that Simon wanted more. Barney hoped he’d just give up, but four months later, the guy was still lurking, still giving him looks he didn’t want, probably just trying to get him to move out so he could have Barney’s room, which was the best in the house.
The party had already started. The music was too loud, the scent of weed strong. As Barney reached the bottom of the stairs, Jamie emerged from the kitchen, holding two bottles of Corona.
“Can Mitch and Pixie sleep in your bed tonight?” Jamie asked.
“No. I’ll be sleeping in my bed tonight.” Probably. “Have a good party.” But not too good, not wreck-the-house good, not kick-my-bedroom-door-open good.
Barney stepped outside and his smile came back, his mood vastly improved by the sight of huge snowflakes floating as if by magic in the air. He loved snow. It hadn’t snowed over Christmas, just rained. His three housemates had gone home to their parents and he’d been on his own until they came back yesterday.
That sounded a bit sad, but he hadn’t minded spending Christmas alone. He’d watched what he liked on TV and been able to eat without being persuaded to cook for someone else. Most importantly, for a few days, everywhere had been tidy and spotlessly clean because after the last housemate had set off for the train station, Barney had spent hours spraying and polishing the communal rooms. He wasn’t a neat freak, but he didn’t like having to put up with other people’s dirt and mess.
Barney turned up his collar and pulled on his hat as he made his way to the bus stop a couple of streets away. He’d packed to stay overnight at his father’s, but he couldn’t count on being invited to sleep over. Since that had never happened, he doubted it would tonight, though he still hoped.
In an ideal world, he’d have a place of his own with no weirdos lurking outside his room and he’d be doing a job he loved that paid a decent wage. But Barney wasn’t currently living in an ideal world. He had two jobs, struggled to save as much money as he could for his project, and he lived in a house with one guy who freaked him out, and another two who smoked too much weed, and he could see no prospect of any of those things changing. Maybe his New Year’s resolution should be to make them change.
Yeah, right. Well, he could look for somewhere else to live, but he had his own bathroom, the room was large and reasonably priced, and the location convenient. It would be hard to find somewhere as good. Even so… Maybe he’d look in the new year.
It wasn’t a long wait before the bus pulled up. He stepped on board and pressed his card to the reader. His dad lived a few miles away in Rottingdean, in a big fuck-off house with his petite but domineering wife Debra. They had two sons and a daughter. All older than Barney. Barney’s mum had been Frank Garrett’s mistress, though Barney hadn’t understood just what that meant until he was a lot older.
Barney had seen a fair amount of his dad when he’d been small. He had his father’s name on his birth certificate and his father’s surname, but after his mother had died when Barney was twelve, he’d gone into care and that had been that. His dad only met up with him a few times a year, though he always sent him a birthday card with a cheque. Same at Christmas. Fifty quid this year, which Barney had used to buy new boots.
He understood why Debra hadn’t wanted another child in the house when she had three teenagers of her own. Though it wasn’t just that. Barney would have been a constant reminder of her husband cheating on her. Debra really wished Barney didn’t exist. But he did, and his dad invited him round every so often, or met him in town and bought him a meal. They’d last met up in October and that was when he’d invited Barney to their New Year’s Eve party. Barney hoped he hadn’t forgotten. He wouldn’t turn down any chance to be with his dad because he was the only relative who acknowledged him, and he remembered when he’d been little, how kind his dad had been to him and his mum.
It was still snowing when he got off the bus in Rottingdean and had started to settle. It was about a fifteen-minute uphill walk to his father’s house from the main road and he could see the lights display before he got there. He headed down the drive through an avenue of trees decorated with oversized baubles and smothered with fairy lights. His father had probably paid someone a lot of money to come and wrap the strings of lights around the trunk and branches. The house was illuminated too, twinkling icicles dangling from the eaves and lining every window, and there was a flickering display of snowflakes being projected onto the front of the building from a machine on the lawn. It looked lovely.
He registered the cars parked out front, the personalised number plates with the initials of his half-brothers and half-sister. No point being jealous. But I am. A bit. Though Barney’s car would be better than all these once he’d finished restoring it. He searched for the bell beneath the large Christmas wreath and pressed it.
Kaz yanked the door open with a smile on her face that fell away when she saw him. “Oh, it’s you. Mum!”
Behind her, Barney could see a huge Christmas tree festooned with colour co-ordinated decorations and big silver bows. Debra was obsessed with how things looked. She came to the door in a short, tight black dress, make-up immaculate, her hair an elaborate sculpture that could probably withstand a storm force gale. Botox had pulled all the expression out of her face.
She stared at him, rolled her eyes and yelled. “Frank!”
Uh oh. Barney didn’t have a good feeling about this. They weren’t expecting him. His dad appeared in a tux and came outside, pulling the door almost shut behind him. Barney knew that was as close as he’d get to going inside. Now he wished he’d not come.
“Hi, Barney. What’s up?”
He’s forgotten. Disappointment tugged at Barney’s heart. He didn’t want to make his dad feel bad that he hadn’t remembered inviting him, but…
“You asked me to come to your party tonight.” He plastered a smile on his face.
“Oh God. Did I? Sorry, Barney. Yeah, I did. I remember now. But there’s been a change of plan. Debra and I are off to an event at The Grand. Staying overnight. The kids are having their own party, with strict instructions not to let anyone throw up in the pool.” He chuckled. “But I’m sure they won’t mind you joining them.”
Oh God, do you know them at all? Though from the way his dad was blocking the door, Barney knew he didn’t expect to him to stay. “No, that’s fine. I’ve got another party I can go to. I just…”
Barney backed away. He was annoyed with himself for looking forward to this. He’d keep the chocolates he’d bought for Debra, and the mince pies he’d made himself and the wine he’d bought for his dad. The wine and the chocolates had cost him more than he should have spent, but he’d wanted to get something that would impress them. He tried to smile and couldn’t.
“Happy New Year, Dad.” Barney set off down the drive.
“Happy New Year,” his father said. “I’ll give you a call.”
Right.
“Did you get rid of that loser?” The loudness of Kaz’s voice showed she’d intended him to hear. “I don’t want him at our party.”
“Don’t talk about him like that. He’s leaving anyway.”
The door slammed and Barney jumped as if he’d been shot in the back. His heart felt like a lump of iron in his chest. He’d never asked his dad for help with anything. Partly out of pride, and partly because he knew Debra would veto any request, no matter how small. The annoying thing was that when his dad was around, she was sweetness and light. But if she saw Barney out in town, she ignored him and once, she’d come into the WHSmith’s where he worked, and cut him dead when he’d greeted her.
His dad owned car dealerships in Brighton and Sevenoaks that specialised in expensive cars like Ferraris and Lamborghinis. The faster the car, the more likely his dad was to stock it. Barney had talked to him about the car he was restoring, so his dad knew he wanted to be a mechanic, but Barney had never been offered a job and he was too proud to ask, too worried that he’d be turned down.
Back at the junction with the main road, he hesitated. Right took him to Brighton, but he didn’t want to go back to the house. Not this soon. It would be self-inflicted torture to listen to the others having a good time, even if it wasn’t the sort of good time he liked. Straight across the road led to the sea.
In the end, he crossed the road and started to walk back to Brighton. The snow was still fluttering down, but he wasn’t cold. He had his big chunky-knit scarf wrapped around his neck, and his blue gloves on his hands. If he got fed up of walking, he could catch the bus. Trouble was, walking gave him time to think, and thinking wasn’t good for his current state of mind.
I’m not happy. But he wasn’t sure how to make himself happy. A new job would help. One that paid enough that he didn’t have to work two jobs. A boyfriend would be nice too. One that didn’t cheat on him, or take him for granted, or knock him around. Barney seemed to have been a bit unlucky with boyfriends, and Simon definitely wasn’t going to get another chance, no matter how hard he lurked.
Thinking about jobs and boyfriends was not going to make him happy. There was no prospect of getting a job as a trainee mechanic because he had no qualifications, and there was no boyfriend because he’d lost faith in finding one who’d be as kind to him as he would be to them.
When a bus pulled up as he reached a stop, he took it as a sign he’d done enough thinking and climbed on. It was warm on board and he took off his gloves and snuggled down in the seat, rubbing the condensation off the window so he could look out at the falling snow. He wished this was a magical bus and he could just keep going, out of Brighton, out of England. Go on an adventure.
But all his adventures were inside his head. He didn’t even have a passport. Though it was more than that. Barney had always been a good boy. His mother had brought him up that way. To be kind and generous. To obey the rules and be careful. So Barney rarely took risks, rarely did the unexpected. Does that make me dull? He clenched his fists in his pockets. Do something brave tonight. He could go to a club and dance, hope that someone might dance with him, dream that someone might be a guy who’d want to see him again…
He stepped off the bus onto a busy promenade full of happy people, many of whom, judging by the meandering path they were taking, were already drunk. Considering it was snowing, he was surprised how little some were wearing, but pubs, clubs and restaurants all over Brighton would be heaving tonight with New Year events, many of which would be costume parties.
As Barney dodged revellers weaving their way along the pavement, he decided he’d treat himself to fish and chips. He was normally frugal with his money, but there was no point thinking he’d be able to use the kitchen back at the house. As he walked along the promenade, he spotted a noisy group ahead and a feeling in his gut told him to be careful.
Despite Brighton largely being a haven for gays, there was an element of the population that resented that, and Barney had good instincts for sensing trouble. But this could just as easily be drug related. He’d begun to detour when he realised two of the men were kicking someone lying curled up on the ground. Oh fuck.
Barney hesitated until he heard a cry of pain, then he ran at the group, hoping surprise might make them scatter. “Hey, stop it!” he shouted as he pushed his way through.
“Get fucking lost.” A guy elbowed Barney hard in the ribs and he yelped and reeled back only to be shoved forward by a protesting woman.
So much for being careful and not taking risks, but Barney wasn’t going to walk away and leave someone to get beaten. When the guy on the ground was kicked again, Barney pulled out his phone and pressed 9-9-9. “I’m calling the police.”
The guy who’d elbowed him snatched the phone from Barney’s hand, threw it on the ground and stamped on it. Pieces scattered everywhere. Shiiit. He heard someone laugh, then a menacing face with multiple piercings, topped by a crewcut, invaded Barney’s space. Barney stood his ground, but inside he was freaking out. I should have just phoned the police, not announced I was doing it. Idiot!
“Come on, Kenzo!” a woman shouted. “He might have got through to the cops. Leave it.”
“I know your face from somewhere,” the guy in front of him said. “Don’t let me see it again.”
Barney gulped. “I know your face too. Better run while you can.”
“Are you threatening me?” Kenzo laughed.
The faint sound of siren filled the air and the guy snorted, turned and walked away with the others.
Oh fuck. Barney’s courage dissolved. He dropped down by the man who lay curled up on the ground. Homeless, by the look of the rolled-up sleeping bag and collection of plastic carriers. He was breathing heavily and groaning. When he tried to get up, Barney took his arm and helped him. Blood was trickling down the guy’s cheek.
“No police,” he muttered. “Little fuckers.”
“You mean the guys who attacked you and not the police, right?”
The man huffed out a laugh, clutched his side and gasped.
Barney glanced at the remains of his phone and sighed. It was insured, but he’d be without one for a few days. “Are you okay?”
The man was taller than Barney, with a scraggy beard. It was hard to tell how old he was, but Barney guessed mid to late thirties. Probably ten or so years older than him. His hat was pulled low over his forehead and he looked as if he was wearing several layers of clothing.
“Your cheek’s bleeding.” Barney found a clean tissue in his pocket and dabbed at the guy’s face.
The man took the tissue from Barney’s fingers and held it there himself.
“Are you injured anywhere else?”
“I’m bruised. I’ll live. Unlike your phone. I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault.” Barney picked up the pieces and stuffed them in his pocket.
The police siren faded away.
“It is my fault. Thanks for coming to my aid. I appreciate it.”
“What did you do? Look at one of them? Mutter some innocuous comment that was taken the wrong way? Like only a mother could love a face like yours?”
The guy laughed, then grimaced in pain. “How did you guess?”
“I’ve been given a black eye twice for looking at someone. Not the same someone. I’m not that much of an idiot. But even a glance is too much when an arsehole is in that sort of mood.” He smiled at the guy and held out his hand. “My name’s Barney.”
The guy hesitated, then shook his hand. “Raf.”
“Are you sleeping rough?” Barney asked. “Or on your way to a costume party as a homeless person?”
“That’s an interesting thought and I wish I could say you’d guessed correctly, but no, I’m sleeping rough.”
“Are the hostels all full?”
“Yep.”
“Oh.” Barney felt sorry for the guy. “Can I buy you some fish and chips? I was just about to get some.”
The silence was so long, Barney wondered whether to repeat what he’d said.
“Do you have an ulterior motive?”
Barney frowned. “Such as? Wanting to nick your sleeping bag?”
Raf smiled. “I was thinking more in terms of you wanting to lead me onto the path of righteousness, and before I got to eat a chip, we’d pray together for Jesus to save me.”
“Er no. You can just eat the fish and chips. I might talk because I’m a bit of a gabbler, but not about Jesus.”
“I’d love fish and chips. Thanks.”
“The best fish and chip shop in Brighton is this way. You okay walking?”
“I’m fine. I think you saved me from serious injury. They were egging each other on. You were brave.”
A warm feeling surged through Barney’s gut. He probably been more stupid than brave, but he’d take brave. The two of them continued along the seafront, the snow falling a little more heavily. There was a thickening layer on the ground.
“You’re not out partying tonight?” Raf asked.
He had quite a posh voice. A nice voice. A voice that didn’t belong to a homeless person, but Barney knew better than to make snap judgements. There were all sorts of reasons why people were homeless and not all of them were to do with drugs and alcohol.
“No. Just doing my superhero thing. Looking for people in trouble, and I didn’t even have to activate my patented superpower.”
“Which is?”
“Screaming very loudly. I also have a pink belt in karate.”
“Is there a pink belt?”
Barney laughed. “I don’t think so. Why don’t you sit here in this shelter while I nip across the road to get the food? Fish and chips or something else? Pie? Battered sausage? Salt and vinegar, a drink? Little wooden fork?”
“Fish and chips would be great. Plenty of salt and vinegar. Yes, to the fork. Black coffee, no sugar. Thank you. I’ve got fifty pence…”
“My treat. I’ll be back in a few minutes.” Barney smiled and hurried across the road.
He wasn’t doing this guy a favour to make himself feel good, but he did feel good about helping him. Was that wrong? Okay, so his New Year’s Eve hadn’t turned out to be the party at his dad’s that he’d hoped for, but at least he had a bed to sleep in, a roof over his head and enough money to buy something hot to eat. He worried that cash given to homeless people might end up getting spent on drugs or alcohol, but he was fine about buying someone a drink or a sandwich. Or fish and chips.
Raf seemed a little…different to most of the homeless people Barney saw around town. Even with the offer of food, he did wonder if Raf would be sitting in the shelter when he got back, but he was on the bench, staring out to sea, and Barney dropped down beside him. Raf started when he saw him, but being homeless would keep you on edge and Raf had already had a bad scare that night.
“Only me.” Barney put the food and the coffees between them.
“Thank you.”
Barney unwrapped the paper from around his tray of food and opened it up on his lap. His mouth was watering and he sighed with pleasure when he bit into the first hot chip. The top ones were the best because they had the perfect amount of salt.
“I don’t know why they taste better eating them outside, but they do, don’t you think?” Barney glanced at Raf. “Even when it’s freezing cold and snowing, though at least it’s not snowing on us under here. Thank you to the Victorians who built this shelter and the wind for blowing offshore.”
Raf was eating quickly, almost shovelling the food in, but he nodded.
“How long have you been homeless?”
“Not long.”
“A bad time of year to have no roof over your head.”
“Yep.”
“What did you do before you became homeless?”
“Lived in a house.”
Barney laughed, then snapped it off. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have laughed. Am I asking too many questions? But I meant what did you do for a living?”
“I owned a company.”
“Oh wow.” Barney couldn’t help but wonder what he’d done to lose a house and a company. Maybe a wife too.
“What about you?” Raf asked.
“I don’t own a company. Or a house.”
Raf chuckled.
“My day job is on the till at WHSmith. Three evenings a week, I clean business premises, when I’m not roaming the streets of Brighton being a superhero, obviously.”
“Are you working tomorrow?”
“Not at WHSmith’s. I have the day off. Though I have to do the cleaning job because there’s only me on duty over the holiday. Instead of going in late after everyone’s left, I can go in early because no one’s working tomorrow.”
That gave him an idea. Definitely not a good one. One that was out of character. But… The snow started to fall more thickly, obscuring the view of the sea, and Barney winced. He couldn’t leave Raf out in this.
Raf finished eating before him and balled up the paper. “Thanks for that. I need to get somewhere under cover before all the good spots are taken.”
“Would you like my scarf?” Barney blurted. It was his favourite one, but he had another.
“Thank you for the offer, but I’m fine.”
“Would… Would you like to come home with me?” Oh God. Did I ask him that?
Raf just stared at him, probably able to tell that Barney had not meant to blurt that out. But he had and he’d stick by his offer.
“Are you sure?” Raf asked.
Barney took a deep breath. “I’ll have to sneak you in, put your stuff somewhere before we arrive so you don’t look homeless… Oh that sounded bad. I’m sorry. I’ll go down and get your things once you’re in my room. I have a shower. You can have the bed and I’ll sleep on the floor. But we have to be careful to get in without anyone noticing.”
One look at Raf, and the others, no matter how stoned and drunk they were, would object to a homeless guy coming into the house. Raf was either a big or wearing a lot of layers and his clothes were dirty. If Barney’s housemates saw him, Barney would be the butt of their jokes for eternity. Probably longer. Barney and the tramp. He could hear them say it.
“Really?” Raf stared straight at him.
“Yes, I really have a shower.” Barney smiled. I’m an idiot.
“Are you thinking you’re an idiot?”
“Oh my God! You have a superpower too. Reading minds is so much more useful than screaming loudly.”
Raf chuckled. “I’m not sure about that.”
Barney sighed. “I’m taking a risk but as long as you don’t trash the place or steal stuff or kill me and spray blood all over the walls, it should be fine. If you are intending to kill me, please don’t make a mess.”
“The mess wouldn’t matter if you were dead.”
“That’s true. So make a mess. It will be my parting gift to my irritating housemates.” This conversation had taken a weird turn.
“I’d be taking a risk too,” Raf said. “You might be luring me somewhere so the group that attacked me earlier can torture and kill me. You lulled me into a false sense of security by helping me, but you’re in league with them and they’re waiting for us to arrive at your house.”
A really weird turn. Barney gaped at him. I like him. “But then I wouldn’t have bought you fish and chips and coffee because torture would result in you vomiting, and think of the mess. Who’d clean it up?”
Raf gave a choked laugh.
“Do you think that lot have enough brain power to plan kidnap and torture?” Barney asked.
“No. You’re right.”
“I live with three other guys but tonight the house will be full of people because they’re having a party. It’ll go on and on and it’ll be noisy but at least you’ll be warm, and you can get clean.”
“Do I smell? Ack, don’t answer that.”
“I wasn’t suggesting you did, but I thought maybe you’d appreciate a shower.”
“I would. Thank you. I think… I think that sounds great. The kindest thing anyone has offered me for a long time. Maybe in forever.” Raf gave a short laugh. “I won’t let you down. I promise not to steal anything or trash the place.”
“Or spray blood everywhere?”
“I’m a very tidy killer.”
Barney gulped. “Don’t forget about my pink belt in karate and my superpower.”
“Oh yeah, I forgot. I won’t mess with you.”
Barney was only slightly reassured.
No Angel by Nora Phoenix
1
The kitchen hummed with activity, delicious smells wafting from the open oven. Josh did a last check on the turkey, and when he confirmed it was perfectly cooked, he carefully lifted it out of the oven.
"T minus fifteen," he told Indy, who stuck a fork into the potatoes to see if they were done.
"Good. We’re right on schedule," Indy said, sending him a happy smile.
Josh took off the oven mitts and put them back into the drawer. The turkey could rest now before their dinner commenced. He checked his list to make sure they hadn't forgotten anything. Indy was making the mashed potatoes, the water for the green beans simmered at a low boil, a sweet potato casserole was browning in the other oven, so it looked like everything was going smoothly.
Behind him, Charlie and Brad were setting the table, with Charlie gently providing instructions. Josh smiled at his patient correction whenever Brad got something wrong. Brad’s dog, Max, napped in the kitchen's corner, having discovered that’s where the best snacks were coming from.
Meanwhile, Blake and Aaron had retreated to the playroom. Blake had apologized, since Aaron was supposed to help with cooking, but he’d had a rough few days at work, apparently. Blake had asked if they could utilize the room for an hour or two so they could play and let Aaron regroup. Of course, they’d all assured them that was fine.
From the living room, sounds of the football game on TV drifted in, with Noah, Connor, and Miles commenting on what sounded like a close match. It was a good thing the Patriots weren't playing, since Miles was a staunch Seahawks fan and liked to goad Noah and Connor about their love for all things Patriots. It was all done in good fun, though Miles liked to live dangerously at times, riding Connor hard.
"The potatoes are done," Indy said.
Josh opened the can of cranberry sauce and dumped it into a bowl. He’d wanted to make it himself but had been overruled by a majority that store-bought was fine, if not better. It went somewhat against his preference for home-cooked food, but he had acquiesced.
"I've put out all the ingredients for your mashed potatoes," he told Indy.
Watching Indy cook was always fun. He'd gotten much better at it, but it still required a lot of focus and concentration from him. Josh watched, his heart softening, as Indy added sour cream and some fresh chives to the bowl and turned the mixer on, the tip of his tongue peeping out from between his lips.
"I love you."
Those words kept falling off his lips all by themselves, and they never failed to make Indy shine with joy at hearing them. Even now, concentrated on getting the mashed potatoes right, he stopped the mixer for a few seconds to face Josh and send him a look so full of love it took Josh's breath away.
"I love you too."
Would he ever grow tired of hearing those words, either from Indy or from Connor? Josh doubted it. Every time he thought his heart couldn't get any fuller, it seemed to make more space. And two days from now, he’d make it official by marrying Connor. It would be a small affair, their double wedding, but that didn’t make it less meaningful. On the contrary, it had always been about their love, not about others or throwing a party. Their wedding fit their love, their family, their hearts.
As Indy went back to his cooking and Josh checked the casserole in the oven, he pondered it. The heart was a funny thing, wasn't it? The older he got, the more he realized that so many people got things wrong about love. He himself had grown up with such a warped version of love, his parents only loving him as long as he conformed to their standards, to their norms. How wrong they had been to call that love.
Love couldn't have conditions, Josh had realized. Love possessed no limits, no fear, no shame. Love rose above that; otherwise, it wouldn't be love. If nothing else, the past year had taught him that. The love that reigned in this house, it wasn't traditional by any standard.
God, his parents would have a fucking heart attack if they ever found out he was in love with not one, but two men. Then Josh thought of their reaction if they ever discovered their other son, Aaron, was not only madly in love with a man as well but got off on pretending to be a puppy with that same man as his owner. They wouldn't just have a heart attack, they would legit die. Either of embarrassment or shame—Josh wasn't sure which—but it was their problem. No one who had ever seen Blake and Aaron together could deny how happy and perfect they were for each other.
And the same was true for Miles and his boys, another unconventional relationship. Josh had not only seen it work, but flourish. He'd had his doubts in the beginning, not because he questioned the love between the three men, but because of the unusual dynamics. Miles being a daddy to Brad, but not to Charlie, and Charlie being way more of a bossy little shit than any of them had expected, and yet it worked. They fit together, like a seamless puzzle.
"Josh, baby, are you with me?" Indy asked, and Josh realized he'd been staring into space for a while. No wonder Indy was checking if he wasn’t having an episode.
He turned toward him. "I'm good, just…thinking."
Indy studied him for a few seconds more, then smiled. "There is a lot to be grateful for, isn't there?" he asked, showing once again he could read Josh's mind.
Josh nodded. "There is. I can't help but think how lucky and blessed we are with our chosen family."
“We are. It hits me on days like this as well,” Indy said, and they shared another moment before they went back to cooking.
Indy set the mashed potatoes aside as Josh added the green beans to the boiling water. He’d prepared a nice dressing for them made with nut oil, lemon juice, and pecans and goat cheese. By the time everything was done, Josh beamed with pride because it all looked amazing. And the timing was dead-on.
They arranged all the food on the beautifully set table and called in the others. Aaron’s previous haunted look had been replaced by the inner peace he often radiated after a puppy play session, and Josh gave him a quick hug. “Feeling better?”
“Much,” Aaron said, hugging him back. “Blake always knows how to center me.”
“Good. You needed it,” Josh said as he let go of his brother.
"The table looks amazing," Miles said, pride audible in his voice. "You boys did a terrific job."
Brad's face lit up. "That was all Charlie, but thank you, Daddy. I helped."
Miles pressed a tender kiss on his lips. "I know you did, sweetheart. Thank you for listening to Charlie's instructions. You did really well."
Charlie had created name cards for everyone. Hand-crafted, beautifully written cards with hand-painted leaves on them. The leaves matched the ones on the napkins Charlie had picked out and folded into intricate flowers. It was a little over the top for an informal gathering like this and yet it was perfect. It was one of the things that Josh loved, how they all had started to explore unique talents and interests.
They found their usual spots, he and Indy next to each other, with Connor and Noah flanking them on either side, and Miles and his boys on either side of him across from them. Blake and Aaron were sitting next to them, with Blake sitting next to his younger brother. Josh was happy to see the two of them growing much closer over the last few months. After some initial struggles, Blake had adapted wonderfully to Brad's unique relationship with Miles, and he fully supported it. Not that Josh had expected anything else from a man who loved to engage in puppy play, but it was beautiful to see him accept this was what Brad needed.
They had just all sat down, everyone praising how beautiful both the table setting and the food looked, when the doorbell rang. Max raised his head and barked, then plopped down again. Josh tensed up. Someone dropping by unexpectedly on Thanksgiving Day? That couldn't be good.
Connor's hand gripped his neck instantly, and Indy reached for his hand from the other side. "We've got you, baby," Connor's calm voice said. "Just breathe, I’ll check it out."
Josh was grateful that Connor waited till Josh was okay before he rose from his chair and hurried to the front door. After he'd opened it, a faint conversation was audible, but not loud enough for Josh to recognize the other voice.
Then Connor called out, "Blake and Brad, can you come over for a second? Your brother is here."
Blake shared a stunned look with Brad. Burke was here? When he and Aaron had visited his younger brother, Benjamin, earlier that morning, Benjamin had mentioned something about Burke calling him and telling him he would visit. Blake hadn't known what to make of that, had thought maybe Benjamin had gotten confused. After all, none of them had heard a peep from Burke since he'd stormed out of this house months ago.
His first instinct was to face Burke alone, but then he realized he couldn't and shouldn't make that decision for Brad. He’d made that mistake too many times in the past, deciding for Brad rather than allowing him to make his own decisions.
So he asked, "Do you want me to talk to him first, or would you prefer facing him together?"
Much to his surprise, Brad didn't look to Miles for guidance. "You talk to him first. If he's still set on being an asshole, I'd much prefer not to see him."
As harsh as that sounded, Blake couldn't agree more with him that it was for the best. He was still amazed at the change in Brad compared to a year ago. The relationship with Miles and Charlie, the guidance he got from the daddy dynamic, it was nothing short of amazing. He’d lost his default sullen expression and, even though he still struggled at times, there was a new joy and contentment in him. No need to let Burke take that from him if he—as Brad had worded it so perfectly—was still set on being an asshole.
He put a soft hand on his brother's shoulder. "I'll go see what he wants.”
He made his way to the front door, where Connor had let Burke in, but not beyond the entrance. Blake appreciated that the man was looking out for all of their best interest, but especially Brad’s. Connor was a stand-in daddy when Miles was away, Blake knew, and Brad treated Connor with nothing but respect and admiration.
Blake shot him a look of gratitude. “Thank you. I’ve got this.”
With one last, none-to-friendly glance at Burke, Connor went back to the kitchen. Blake studied his brother. He looked well, a little more tan than before, and from the looks of it, well-rested and fed.
"What brings you here?" he asked.
Burke met his inquisitive gaze head on. "I thought it was a good day to make amends, but I apologize for intruding. I tried your house first, but your current house guests said you were celebrating Thanksgiving here, so I came over before I lost the nerve."
"The nerve for what?"
"To apologize for being a complete asshole to you."
Blake cocked his head, then studied his brother a little more. "There's something different about you," he observed.
Burke smiled, but it wasn't a happy smile. "Maybe because I'm sober?"
Blake couldn't help his eyes from widening. "Sober?" he repeated stupidly, his mind contemplating what Burke meant. Their father had been an alcoholic, a mean one, and surely Burke wouldn't be stupid enough to fall into the same addiction, would he?
"Apparently, I managed to hide it well, but I've been a high-functioning alcoholic for the last few years. After I ran off from you, I quit my job and moved down South, looking for a fresh start. I thought a change of scenery would help me, and it did, but not until after I hit rock bottom. But that's a story for another day. I just wanted to tell you I'm sober and that I want to make amends."
Blake blinked slowly. "You're going through the program," he said, recognizing Burke's language. Holy fuck, his brother was an alcoholic. "The steps. You're following the steps." He knew them well enough from the many people who'd stayed in his house who'd been recovering drug or alcohol addicts, fueled by their years of being abused.
Burke hesitated, but then he nodded. "Yes, but that's not why I'm apologizing. It's not because it's a requirement or a step. I mean it. I fucked up big time with you."
Burke was an alcoholic. How the hell had he missed that, Blake wondered. He was hit with a similar sense of anger at himself as when he'd discovered Brad's issues. He'd always thought he'd been close with his brothers. How wrong he had been. Brad had suffered so hard, and Blake had never noticed enough to say anything, and here was Burke, admitting to a years-long addiction Blake had known nothing about. But he would have to deal with that later. This wasn't about him or his failures. This had to be about Burke.
"I appreciate you coming and apologizing," Blake said. "I hope you realize we’ll need some more conversations before I can put this behind us, but you coming here is a great start."
He watched as Burke visibly relaxed a little, then said, "You didn't hurt only me, though. The fact that you ran off from Brad as well impacted him. He's been going through a lot of stuff, and he could've used your support."
"Is he okay? The cancer isn't back, is it?" Burke asked, a hint of panic in his voice. Somehow, that made Blake feel better. Despite all his shortcomings, Burke really did care about them.
"Physically, he's fine. Emotionally, he's been dealing with a lot, but he's got it handled now, or at least, he's getting there." He waited a beat to consider how much he should tell Burke, then decided he’d better test the waters as promised. “He’s seeing someone. It’s serious."
Burke's eyes widened. "Brad’s got a boyfriend?"
"He's got two: Miles—the FBI agent who protected Indy for a while—and Charlie, who you know. The three of them are in a committed relationship. Moreover, Miles and Brad have a daddy–boy relationship. I'm telling you all this before I allow you to come in further. This is not my house, but Brad does live here, and I won't allow you to criticize him, his relationship, or that of the other people present. That includes Aaron, by the way, and yes, he and I are still engaged in puppy play. Is any of this going to be an issue for you?"
He realized it was somewhat cruel of him to stack all this information and dump it on Burke like this. But he had to know what his brother's attitude would be like. In this house, he couldn't let him in if he was set on continuing the judgmental behavior he had shown before toward Blake and Aaron. That wouldn't fly here, and Blake would do whatever it took to not only protect his brother, but his boyfriend and everyone else.
Burke swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing. "That's…" He cleared his throat, then tried again. "That's all fine. I won't say anything. It doesn't mean much, but I am awfully sorry about the way I treated Aaron, and your relationship. I'd love the opportunity to explain why I reacted like that in more detail, but another time."
Blake saw nothing but honesty on his brother's face, then questioned if he even knew him well enough to make that judgment. "Understand this: you know I'm a man of second chances. I always have been. But where the people in this house are concerned, you'll find the second chance is your last one. This is family, Burke, and I'm telling you to respect that. You fuck up again, and you're out. I don't care if you're my brother by blood, I will not allow you to hurt those I love again. Do you understand me?"
Burke blinked a few times. "You've changed," he said. "I've never seen you this protective."
"Well, we’ve all changed. Brad, me, and hopefully you. Brad and I have changed for the better, and I hope that's the case with you as well."
Burke cringed a little. "I'd love to say yes, but I'm much too aware I'm very much a work in progress, so I hope you cut me some slack as I try to rediscover myself."
"Slack, yes, but I've told you where I draw the line. As long as you stay on the right side of that line, we’re good. You want to come in to celebrate Thanksgiving with us?"
"Are you sure I'm welcome?" Burke asked. "I'm not sure what you told everyone, but I can't imagine I'm high on their list of people they would like to have over for a family holiday like this."
For the first time, Blake sent him a genuine smile, and he put a hand on Burke's shoulder as he spoke. "Bro, you'll find there's not a more welcoming bunch than these people. They will take you in as one of their own if you'll accept them as they are."
A little frown appeared between Burke's eyes. "Are you telling me the puppy play and daddy kink isn't all of it?"
Blake laughed. "Dude, not even half.”
A Crush for Christmas by Eloise East
Chapter 1
2017
Colton
“Which are you gonna pick, Dani?”
Jimmy’s low, Southern drawl vibrated through Colton Jenkins’s body as packed together as they were in the heaving bar. He rolled his eyes at their juvenile game but waited for her answer, nonetheless.
“I’m looking at those two. I’m calling them ‘Suit’ and ‘Red.’” Dani chuckled as she pointed her finger towards the bar at a tall, muscular guy wearing a suit that appeared to be moulded to his body, and then to a slightly smaller, less muscly man about ten feet away from them. The smaller one wore a dark red shirt, but that was all Colton could see.
“No way!” Jimmy answered. “There’s no way on God’s green earth they will be up for a threesome.”
Dani turned her face to Jimmy, eyebrow raised. “And why the hell not?”
Jimmy glanced back over at the guys, and his forehead creased as he shook his head. “I just don’t see it.”
She twisted to Colton. “What do you think?”
He waved his hand dismissively. “I’m staying out of it.”
“Colton!” Dani whined. When all he did was stare at her, she huffed and turned back to Jimmy. “What about you?”
“Easy,” Jimmy said with a grin. “Those two.” He lifted his chin to indicate the table right in front of them where two women sat, staring at Jimmy while holding their straws to their mouths.
“Fuck, Jimmy. That’s cheating.”
“What did I do?”
Their squabbling continued, but Colton tuned it out. Every night out was the same, although the results differed. They chose two people—guys for Dani, any gender for Jimmy—to see if they could persuade them to have a threesome. Colton would give them some points for being completely up front with the people involved—not about the game but about it being just one night, not a long-term investment.
Dani had been hurt before by asshole boyfriends and was a lot more cautious now. She shied away from any kind of relationship that lasted longer than a night, and thankfully, in some ways, New York had plenty of people to choose from.
Jimmy, on the other hand, was in love with his boss. Head over heels, completely, totally besotted. He’d been hired by a company as a personal assistant to one of the managers and had been working there for three years before the manager left, leaving Vanessa in their stead. Jimmy had fallen hard but refused to say a word, not wanting to lose his job, understandably. Due to that, he played hard when he wasn’t working. Colton wished Jimmy would take a chance one day and explain to Vanessa exactly what he was feeling. Jimmy would be pleasantly surprised if Colton’s gut instinct was any indication. He’d only seen her a few times, but she seemed genuine enough.
As for him, he wanted it all—love, marriage, kids, the whole shebang. He hadn’t been able to find anyone that made his heart leap, though. His instinct was surprisingly quiet when it came to his own love life.
He lifted his beer and swallowed some of the lukewarm liquid, grimacing as he gazed around the dimly lit room. Beer should only be ice cold, in his opinion. Colton scratched at the scruff on his jaw, knowing it needed to be trimmed soon. When it grew longer than three days’ worth, it began to look unkempt. He didn’t worry as much when he was working the stalls in the winter because it kept him warmer as he stood selling his stock to tourists and locals alike in the freezing temperatures of New York City. Luckily, he also had decent clothes to keep the chill from invading his bones.
Union Square Holiday Market had been a good choice again so far. Although he always had to finish earlier than when it ended on Christmas Eve, he didn’t mind at all. Seeing his mother was more important, even if she was over three thousand miles away from him at the moment.
“What do you think?”
Colton tuned back in to the conversation, staring blankly at Jimmy. “What?” He glanced back and forth between his two best friends, mentally acknowledging that if Jimmy hadn’t been in love with Vanessa, he and Dani would make a really good couple.
Jimmy sighed and pursed his lips. “Weren’t you listening?”
“Nope.” Colton didn’t see the point in denying it.
“Do you want to get out of here?” Colton raised his eyebrows. “What about your conquests?”
Dani shook her head. “I can’t be bothered tonight, to be honest.” She drained her glass of wine before reaching forward to place it on the bar between two patrons who were standing there. Dragging her coat on, she crossed her arms and tapped her foot. Patience had never been one of her virtues.
Snorting, Colton excused himself to a woman as he put his unfinished beer down next to her, then offered his elbow to Dani. “Your chariot awaits, my lady,” he said with a grin. “Come on, bucko,” he added, peering over his shoulder at Jimmy, whose face had fallen as he stared at the two women from earlier.
“Fine.” Jimmy’s petulant tone had Colton sniggering as he guided Dani through the rowdy throng to the exit.
Dani shuddered, as did he when the cold bite of the wind invaded the gaps in his clothing, sending goosebumps along Colton’s skin. He buttoned his coat, turning his collar up against the frigid air and wrapped his arm around Dani as they walked to the subway.
They had met at that bar because it was close to the market. He hadn’t had any plans to find a hookup, so hadn’t changed before meeting them. Although his clothes were good, they didn’t keep all the cold out. Dani would be frozen if they didn’t get her home quickly. As per their routine, all three trudged to the train before Colton waved goodbye to them both and made his own way home.
Finally arriving at the place he called his, Colton dropped his keys onto the kitchen counter and sighed. He loved his little one-bed apartment, but he’d always hoped for more. Since his father had died ten years ago, he’d been alone in New York. His mother had decided, not long after, she couldn’t stand being in the busy city a moment longer, despite being a New Yorker born and bred, and had emigrated across the Atlantic to the UK where his dad’s family lived. Colton didn’t blame her. There was nothing in the Big Apple for her, except him. All of his mother’s family had passed years before, so there was nothing holding her there any longer.
Colton refused to give up his home. He wanted to make things work in the city where his parents had chosen to raise him. Times were hard, and many a night, he’d eaten noodles or such like to make sure he could afford the rent that month. He was pleased to note, he had never missed a payment. Things were difficult, though, and something needed to change if he wanted to continue doing what he loved.
Glancing over at the small pile of wood in front of his window, he smiled. It wasn’t much but being able to afford decent wood to create the trinkets and gifts he sold was pleasing. He spent much of his free time working with the wood to make keychains, pens, toys, decorations, small boxes, candle holders and much more. His market stall was his pride and joy, all the stock being handmade by him.
Colton’s smile faded a little as he thought about the need for more income. Rent was rising, as always, and he needed to figure out what he was going to do.
After sending a text to Dani and Jimmy telling them he was home, he warmed up his noodles and sat on the lone sofa, thinking about his upcoming trip. Every year since she’d moved, Colton visited his mother in the UK at Christmas. It wasn’t just because it was Christmas, but also because her birthday was the day after. Unfortunately, due to costs, Colton could only stay for a week. He hated leaving her each time, but she was happy, and he couldn’t wish for more.
The previous year, she had moved into a nursing home. She was only sixty-five, but she had insisted, in one of her lucid moments, that everyone stop worrying over her and let her stay somewhere she would not be a burden. The whole family had rallied at that, but she had put her foot down, and that had been it. Colton had not been there to see the move, but last Christmas, he had visited the nursing home and been overwhelmed by how nice it and all the staff were.
They had welcomed him as if they knew him, and when he’d asked, they’d explained his mother had been talking about him non-stop, so it felt like they had met him already.
It had been difficult to see her there, but Colton knew it had been the best decision. His mother had lupus—or systemic lupus erythematosus—which basically meant her immune system attacked the healthy parts of her body by mistake. It caused inflammation to her joints, rashes and a whole dictionary full of different symptoms that made her life difficult. It wasn’t called the ‘disease of a thousand faces’ for nothing.
The worst thing for Colton was the memory issues. Whenever his mother had a flare-up, her memory was one of the first things to show it. She would stare at an object or person, uncomprehending who or what it was. She would forget how to do the simplest of tasks, like how to flush the toilet or how to switch on the TV. It broke his heart to see her that way, especially when there was no cure.
Shaking his head, he thrust away his maudlin thoughts and focused on what he needed to do before he flew to be with her. He had just over a month before his flight, and there was something special he wanted to make her.
****
With Jimmy and Dani’s help, he packed up his stall at the end of his season and made sure everything fit into the little van he’d hired for the evening. It was an expense he hated paying out for but a necessary one because there was no way he’d be able to cart everything to his apartment. He knew from experience. The first year, he’d used a large trolley to pull his stock to and from his apartment. Never again.
After they unloaded the boxes and trudged them all the way up to the second floor, they collapsed, gasping for breath.
“Jesus, Colton. You have to get a ground floor apartment. This shit is a killer,” Jimmy stated as he lay spread eagle on the floor.
Colton leaned against the wall, legs spread as he recovered. Jimmy was right, but he had no choice. At least, it kept him fit without the need for a gym membership.
“It’s takeout night,” Dani declared. “My treat.”
“You don’t need—”
“Shut up,” she said without heat. “You’re not here for Christmas, so this will be our Christmas meal.” She didn’t move from her position of resting her head on Jimmy’s stomach as she dialled for Chinese.
Colton felt bad that he couldn’t help out with the cost of the takeaway, but all his money had been sunk into the flight and hotel. He wished he’d been able to stay at his uncle’s place; however, they had a three-bedroom house with all the bedrooms full of kids. When he’d visited last year, he had used some extra money to reserve a room at a small hotel chain. Luckily, it was closer to his mother’s nursing home than his uncle’s house.
As they ate chicken chow mein, duck pancakes and beef satay, they talked about what Jimmy’s and Dani’s plans were, then decided what the three of them were doing for New Year’s Eve. Dani had insisted on the ritual of New Year because Colton wasn’t with them for Christmas, and he hadn’t had the heart to tell her he hated the celebration.
“I’m heading home.” Dani lifted herself from the floor with a groan. “My muscles are never going to forgive you, Geppetto.”
Colton snorted at the nickname Dani called him on occasion, usually when she was hurling insults. Problem was, he didn’t mind being thrown in with the man who had made a wooden boy.
“You’ll survive, Dee,” he retorted with his own nickname, knowing she hated the shortened version.
“Fuck you.” She saluted him with her middle finger before hauling him in for a hug. “Take care and say hello to your mom for me.” Dani kissed him on the cheek and pulled away.
“Well, another year, another flight. Are you ever going to move over there?”
It was a question Jimmy asked every year, and every year, Colton’s answer was the same, “My home is here.”
Jimmy nodded slowly, then dragged him closer, wrapping his arms around him. “Gonna miss you, Colt.”
Colton swallowed hard. He knew what Jimmy meant. It was just as difficult for him not to be with part of his family—as he thought of Jimmy and Dani—as it was for them, even though they had blood family to celebrate with.
“Safe flight.”
Locking the door behind them, Colton rested his forehead against the painted wood and closed his eyes. His emotions were all mixed up between joy that he’d see his mother and sadness that he wouldn’t see Jimmy and Dani. But he only saw his mother once a year, so his friends would have to wait.
He threw himself into finishing his packing, setting his alarm for his god-awful early flight, and crashed.
****
By the time he had arrived at the hotel in Cambridge, he was exhausted. He dragged his two suitcases into the room and let it slam behind him, wincing and silently apologising to anyone who was asleep, despite it being early evening in the UK. He dropped onto the bed and stared at the ceiling. He’d dragged himself out of bed at two-thirty that morning to catch his 6 a.m. flight and was glad for it because it meant his jet lag wouldn’t, hopefully, be as bad as normal.
With the UK being five hours ahead of New York, Colton had basically lost a day due to travelling. But he was determined to make sure his tiredness didn’t interfere with seeing his mother. At that thought, he picked himself up and headed for a shower.
Rudolph the Rescue Jack Russell by Andrew Grey
“YOU KNOW you don’t have to do this,” Palmer said with his usual gentle expression. He had been Alex’s therapist for the last few years, and Alex knew he was right. There was no real need for him to go to the shelter, except that he was determined to conquer one of his fears. The list of things he avoided was long: birds (they carried disease); heights (because he just knew he was going to fall); clowns (the damned things were scary); even rabbits (he just knew those beady eyes were judging him). And dogs. Every other kid he’d known growing up had a dog, and they had to shut them away every time Alex came over, which he didn’t do very often because they didn’t want to play with the weird kid who didn’t like Fido.
So here he was standing outside a shelter near Carlisle, Pennsylvania, where he could hear the barks, yips, and howls of what sounded like a million dogs. His instinct was to get back in his car, close the door, start the engine, and peel the hell out of there, except that would involve another of Alex’s issues—wasting his tires by spinning them. Instead he stood still, breathing in through his nose and out his mouth the way Palmer had taught hm.
“Are you Alexander?” a “stop the clocks and hold time still so Alex could take in the epitome of gorgeousness” man asked as he strode across the gravel path from the converted barn that held the shelter. Alex willed himself not to do something stupid as the man’s lips parted and his mouth drew upward and deep blue eyes took on a sparkle. “I’m Luther. We talked on the phone a little while ago.” Luther wore jeans that hugged his thighs just the right away. His coat was unzipped, so Alex got a peek at his lime green shirt, open at the collar to reveal the barest hint of golden skin before it disappeared behind the fabric.
He refused to draw into himself the way he usually did when he met people he knew were so far out of his league that he might as well not even try. The barks and yips drifted out of the building and into the cold early winter morning. Alex’s fear threatened to rise, but Luther simply smiled more brightly. “That’s me,” he finally answered, proud his voice didn’t crack.
“You said on the phone that you have an issue with dogs and that you were hoping to have a chance to face it,” Luther said. “That’s pretty brave.”
“How many dogs are there?”
“We currently have fifteen. There are some larger dogs as well as smaller ones. We are working with a few to correct some behavioral issues. Those are not ones we’re going to put with you. Since you said that you were trying to get over a fear of dogs, I thought of five that are really well behaved. Can I ask what it is that you’re actually afraid is going to happen?” Luther asked gently.
Alex liked that Luther didn’t make a move toward the shelter or try to push him forward. Talking was good. That was what Palmer had told him. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s going to attack me or… eat my face or something.” He could tell Luther was trying not to grin.
“Okay. First thing, we don’t have any face-eaters here. All of the dogs I think I can introduce you to are sweet animals. They might try to lick you, and a few of them will bound around because they’re so excited to see you. These are dogs who love attention and people.”
Alex felt himself tense. “Are you sure?”
“Very much so,” Luther said. “Why don’t you come inside? All of the dogs are in enclosures. I thought you could just look around and see them. They can’t get out, and you can take your time.” He led the way to the door and opened it, then held it while Alex decided if this was truly a good idea or the worst thing he’d tried since those watermelon smoothies with vodka last summer. Yuck.
Making up his mind, he took a step inside. Enclosures lined both sides of the concrete aisle floor, some larger than others. The scent of dog was prevalent but not unpleasant. “There’s a lot of them.”
“Yes, there are, and we got a call an hour ago about a couple more that Mitchell is going to pick up when he finishes at the clinic. I volunteer here a couple days a month just to help out after work and on weekends.”
Alex swept his gaze over all the dogs. Some of them looked like the embodiment of him: closed off, way back in their enclosures. One even shook a little. “So these are all alone?”
“Yes. We are trying to find each dog their forever home. Don’t feel like you have to hurry. I know this is a big step for you, and the dogs are always a little energetic when someone comes in, but they’ll settle down.”
Alex nodded, his heart racing as he took a step toward one of the enclosures. “Is something wrong with him?”
“Her,” Luther corrected gently, those big eyes going even softer. “Yeah. When we found her, she had three puppies and was giving them everything she had. Elsa here was so thin and malnourished that a lot of her hair had fallen out. The pups are weaned now, and we’ve been feeding her well, so her hair is growing back.” Luther knelt by the cage, and Elsa came over to him. She was reddish brown, wide in her shoulders, but not too big. Luther opened the enclosure, and Elsa went right to him and rested against his leg.
“She looks strong.”
“Under normal circumstances, she would be. But now she’s a little weak. You can pet her if you want. She’s a real sweetheart.” The way Luther said the words almost broke Alex’s heart. He could hear the hurt for her in his voice, but more than that, Alex saw the pain in those big brown doggie eyes, like she understood a hurt that went so deep, you didn’t know how to climb out. “You don’t have to.”
“What will happen to her?” Alex asked, not ready to try touching… yet.
“Hopefully we can find her a home. Mitchell spayed her, and she’s growing stronger. I’ve been thinking about adopting her myself,” Luther said. “But I want to do that with each of the dogs, and Mitchell says I need to be sure.” He lifted his gaze to meet Alex’s. “I’m a big softie.”
“It doesn’t look like it at all to me,” Alex said before clamping his lips closed.
Before Alex could die of embarrassment, Luther chuckled warmly, his gaze darkening for just a second. “I really am. If I could, I swear I’d take half the dogs home with me.”
“You don’t have one?” Alex asked. He found his attention drawn to Luther, his worry about the dogs around him abating somewhat.
“No. I’ve moved a couple times in the last few years, and I haven’t been settled enough for a dog. I just got a job in the psychology department at Dickinson College, so hopefully I’m going to be here for a while. I just have to make sure I get the right companion.” For a second Alex wondered what kind of company Luther wanted, but then he was probably being foolish. Of course he meant one of the dogs. He wasn’t talking about Alex, even though Luther made Alex’s temperature rise. He gave Elsa a gentle pat, and she licked his hand. Then Luther guided her back in the enclosure and closed the door.
Alex followed him through the shelter, watching each dog as they passed. A few whined, and one barked, making Alex jump.
“That’s Janie. She’s just loud,” Luther said as he approached the enclosure. The dog stopped barking and stretched, her backside in the air, tail wagging. “She’s just getting my attention.” He petted her gently, and Janie settled down. “Sometimes it’s just a matter of seeing what they want.” They moved on, and Luther opened another enclosure and took out a small dog that couldn’t have weighed more than five pounds. “This is Dolly. She loves people.” Luther held her gently. “Come on over. She’s just a sweetheart.”
“Okay.” Damn it all, Alex felt like a kid. Hell, most kids did this all the damned time, and here he was ready to piss himself over a tiny dog. He reached out and lightly stroked behind her ears, half closing his eyes, ready to pull away at any second.
“She likes you.”
Alex continued gently stroking between her ears, and Dolly looked up at him with beautiful eyes. “She’s so nice.”
“Yes, she is. Most dogs are. I know that some can be really energetic, like Rex over there. He has so much energy he doesn’t know what to do about it, so he comes off as aggressive, but he just wants attention.” Luther continued holding Dolly for him, and Alex kept petting her. Before he knew it, Luther had transferred Dolly to his arms, and Alex just petted her while she lay there.
Alex blinked when he truly realized he was holding a dog. “How did you do that?” he asked. “You just gave her to me and….” He could feel his tension rising.
“You were comfortable, and she’s happy with you.” Luther gently stroked his shoulder. “You aren’t going to hurt her, and she likes you.”
“She does?” All the dogs he’d met growing up had tried to jump on him to push him down. They barked and raced at him like they wanted to chase him away. Dolly was sweet, and she slowly turned her head, then rested it against his chest.
“She’ll stay right there for as long as you want to pet her,” Luther said quietly before taking Dolly and gently setting her back in the enclosure. “You realize you held a dog? And I think you liked it.”
No one ever teased Alex, but Luther seemed to be. For a second, he wondered if Luther was picking on him, but that smile had returned.
“Okay. I guess I did.” Alex smiled to himself. He and Palmer had been dealing with his anxiety issues for a while, and they had agreed that Alex should try working on just one of them to start. Alex had chosen dogs because he passed by the veterinary office and the shelter every day on his way to work at a grocery store corporate office, where he was in charge of store payouts.
“How about another?” Luther asked. “This is Rudolph. He’s mostly Jack Russell terrier. He was brought in because his owner passed away. Her son brought him here to get rid of him.”
Alex found himself almost unable to talk. “You mean he just threw away this little guy?”
“He did. From what Mitchell said—Mitchell runs the shelter and is the vet up the street—Rudolph here hated the son with a passion, barking at him and snarling all the time. So if we know nothing else, Rudolph has good people instincts, because the guy was a real jerk.” Luther let Rudolph out, and he pranced right up to Alex and wound through his legs, happy and maybe a little jumpy, tail going a million miles an hour. Rudolph put his front paws on Alex’s legs and looked up at him with what had to be a doggie smile.
“What do I do?” Alex asked.
“Just pet him. Rudolph is so wonderful. We’ve had some interest in him, but everyone seems to pick a different dog. He’s really special, though.”
Alex took a deep breath, and sweat broke out on the back of his neck. But he had just held a dog, so he could do this. Before he could change his mind, he leaned down and petted Rudolph, whose tail just wagged faster, if that was possible. Rudolph licked his hand, and Alex pulled back. “Is he tasting me?”
“Sort of,” Luther said. “He isn’t going to bite you. Dogs use their nose and tongue to explore the world the way we use our hands and eyes. So it’s okay. He’s just getting to know you.” Alex tried again, petting Rudolph. He wasn’t sure how much more of this he was going to be able to take. The dogs had been good and the experience was positive, but Alex wondered how long it would be before something went wrong—because something always did.
“He’s really sweet,” Alex said to try to reassure himself. Palmer had said that saying positive things out loud so he could hear them when he was stressed might help him.
“Do you want to sit with him?” Luther asked. Then he led Alex to a chair. He sat, and Rudolph jumped onto his lap and balanced on his legs, tongue out, tail going, watching him with that doggie smile.
Luther said nothing, and Alex petted Rudolph, who sat down. “I think I like him.”
“He sure likes you.”
Alex kept petting Rudolph. “Do you get a lot of dogs at this time of year?”
“Christmas is a hard time for a lot of people. Mitchell says that the holidays are a time when lots of people get dogs. Some get them as gifts for others, but Mitchell discourages that. A dog is a personal choice. Last year he had someone bring a dog back the day after Christmas for a refund.” Luther rolled his eyes, and Rudolph licked Alex’s chin. Under normal circumstances, something like that would send his anxiety through the roof, but Alex didn’t seem to mind with Rudolph.
“I really like him. You’re a good boy,” Alex told Rudolph, who leaned against his chest. “You seem to like me too.” Alex took a deep breath, and to his surprise, some of his general anxiety began to abate. The world tended to be a source of worry for him. He and Palmer had talked through this a number of times. He was on medication and had tried yoga, breathing, meditation, and God knows what else. But this little dog soothed him in a way he never would have thought possible.
“Hello,” someone called from the door.
“Should we put him back?” Alex asked as a man and a woman came inside. “You need to help them.”
Luther smiled at him once more. “Just sit there with Rudolph and relax. I’m going to help these people. You can take all the time you want.” He leaned closer, his breath warming Alex’s cheek. “Maybe what you both need is a little attention and care, and there is nothing like a little puppy love.” He went over to greet the couple and show them through the shelter while Alex sat with Rudolph.
He watched and petted the energetically sweet dog. Alex kept half an eye on the couple as Luther talked to them about various dogs. They took a few out, including Elsa and a dog named Tally, as well as Rex and Tipper, but they couldn’t seem to make up their minds.
“I think I want a smaller dog,” the woman said. She looked at Dolly and one other before turning her attention to where Alex sat. As soon as she looked at him, Alex’s anxiety went wild. He had no idea why, but he didn’t like the woman at all. Something got his back up, and he put an arm around Rudolph to shield him from her.
“Is that dog available?” she asked, pointing a manicured finger in their direction.
“That’s Rudolph. He’s been here in the shelter a few weeks,” Luther said. He gave her Rudolph’s backstory as the dog pressed closer to Alex, pulling his tail close. The wagging came to a halt. “He’s—”
“Not available,” Alex found himself saying in a rush. “He’s being adopted. But I’m sure you’ll find the perfect dog for you.” Preferably someplace else, he added in his mind. “Isn’t that right, Rudolph? You’re coming home with me.” That tail started going fast, like he understood Alex. Rudolph licked his chin again, prancing on Alex’s legs even as Alex wondered if he’d made a huge mistake.
Peppermint Kisses for the Omega by Lacey Daize
Chapter 1 - Liam
“What do you mean you’re going to Hawaii for Christmas?”
My mom turned from the sink, crossed her arms and fixed me with a stare. “Just what I said, your father and I are headed to Hawaii for Christmas.”
“But… Christmas dinner… seeing everyone.”
She shook her head. “Christian has that big case, and he can’t get away from the city. Philip is spending the holiday with his new girlfriend. It would just be us, and you.”
My mother sighed, walked over and set her hand on my shoulder. “Your father has always wanted to go to Hawaii, and we were able to get a deal on a travel package. I want to do this for him while we’re still young enough to enjoy it.”
The tone was soft, but firm, my mom’s alpha stubbornness clear. It had been decided. I was on my own for the holiday.
I sighed and sank into one of the kitchen chairs.
She sat across from me. “It’s time for you to spread your wings a bit Liam. Why not plan something fun with your friends?”
“Like what?” I asked, crossing my arms on the table and dropping my forehead to them.
“Why don’t you head up to the cabin? It’s a nice drive, and the roads stay pretty clear. You can invite some friends and celebrate your own Christmas. Make it a few days, and you can go skiing as a group.”
“But the store…” I protested, raising my head again.
Mom smiled and rested her hand on my arm. “You’re not the only employee sweetie. I think James and the part-timers can handle the last of the Christmas shopping.”
“What if there’s a rush?”
Mom laughed. “Maybe that new mall in Mount Sable will see a rush, but most of our holiday season is over. We don’t stock the latest and greatest, so we get the stragglers who are in for a last minute gift.”
I took a deep breath and released it slowly.
Mom frowned. “You don’t have to go to the cabin sweetie, but you should at least try to do something fun.”
“No… I’ll go. It sounds better than moping around here.”
Mom patted my arm. “Just you wait. You’ll realize that hanging around your friends is much more entertaining than spending the holiday with us old people.”
I snorted. “You aren’t old. You’re barely fifty.”
Mom smiled. “Thanks, but you should still spend time with people your own age. It seems you live at the store some days.”
“Who else is gonna take it over when you retire? Christian is off being a big-shot lawyer, and Philip seems intent on his art.”
Mom stood and rested her hand on my shoulder. “Just because you’re taking over the store, doesn’t mean you should ignore your life. You have time to learn. Ok? Have fun. Find a mate, or heck, a date. The store isn’t going anywhere.”
I sighed. I had no intention of finding a mate, or even dating. I’d fallen for my alpha, Alex, years ago, and he showed no interest in me. But a holiday dinner and skiing with him and our other friends did sound fun.
“There’s gas up there for the stove, and plenty for the generator in case the power goes out?” “The propane tank was filled a month or so ago, before your father and I went up for the weekend. We took up gas cans too. There’s plenty of wood for the fireplace. There’s no reason not to go.”
“Ok.”
“Good,” Mom said. “You’ve got your own keys, right?”
I nodded. “Yeah.”
“Ok. Just clean up when you’re done.”
Mom patted my shoulder and wandered off.
I stood and made my way to the living room, where my dad was busy knitting what looked to be a receiving blanket. I plopped down on the couch.
“Have a nice chat with your mother?” he asked as he counted the stitches.
“She told me you two are headed to Hawaii. Then somehow got me to agree to host my own party at the cabin.” I paused, then motioned at the blanket. “Who’s pregnant?”
“Your cousin Jeffrey. He’s due in a few months, so I need to work fast.”
“Send my regards.”
“You know I wouldn’t mind knitting one of these for you one of these days.”
“Not this again dad. I’ll mate when I’m ready.”
“I’d just like to enjoy my grandkids before I get old. Besides, you’ll love being pregnant. I always did.”
“And mom hated it the one time she was pregnant.”
Dad laughed. “Yeah. Point zero five percent chance of an omega male getting an alpha female pregnant, and we beat those odds in the handful of times I topped. But we got your little brother from it.” He smiled. “Though I don’t know which she hated more, the pregnancy or breastfeeding.”
“And yet you think I’ll love it?”
He glanced up and smirked. “It’s an alpha thing. Alphas love being in control, and the baby is in control while pregnant. It’s different for us omegas, and beta women. The instincts don’t fight it.”
Dad finished the row and set the blanket aside. “What’s bothering you kiddo? Are you really that upset that we’re going to Hawaii?”
I sighed. “It’s not that… sorta. I want you two to enjoy yourselves. I was just looking forward to seeing everybody.”
“Can’t do anything about Christian and Philip though. They’re not going to be here.”
I slumped. “I know.”
“You said you’re going to the cabin?”
“Yeah, mom seemed to think spending the holiday up there with friends was the right solution.”
“It’s not the worst idea.”
“It’s just… different.”
“Nothing bad about different. One day you’ll be the host, so might as well get a taste of it now.”
“Gee dad… thanks.”
Dad chuckled and picked up his knitting again. “You’ll see Liam. This is gonna be a good thing.”
I stood. “I’m gonna head home. If I’m hosting a party, I’d better invite some people.”
Dad laughed as I walked to the door. “I swear you’re the only person I know who’s not excited to get together with friends.”
I rested my hand on my coat. “It’s not that. I’m just going to miss you guys.”
Dad met my eyes with a smile. “We’ll do something when we get back. Ok?”
I smiled. “Ok.”
I pulled my coat on and strode out into the cold. I had a party to plan.
Barbara Elsborg lives in Kent in the south of England. She always wanted to be a spy, but having confessed to everyone without them even resorting to torture, she decided it was not for her. Volcanology scorched her feet. A morbid fear of sharks put paid to marine biology. So instead, she spent several years successfully selling cyanide.
After dragging up two rotten, ungrateful children and frustrating her sexy, devoted, wonderful husband (who can now stop twisting her arm) she finally has time to conduct an affair with an electrifying plugged-in male, her laptop.
Her books feature quirky heroines and bad boys, and she hopes they are as much fun to read as they are to write.
Nora Phoenix is a bestelling author of MM romance. She writes in various subgenres of gay romance, including contemporary, mpreg, and sci fi. Nora is known for a mix of steamy romance, usually a dash of kink, all the feels, and some suspense.
Proud single mom. Book addict. Eternal optimist. Unapologetic feminist. Ace. Panromantic.
I am Elouise East but feel free to call me Elli. I write sweet and steamy connections in gay romance. I also touch on taboo stories under the name Elouise R East.
Books that tell the stories where friendship and family are the focal point - be it blood family or chosen - is very important to me. That’s why I include a variety of personalities, talents, ages, situations and abilities as I believe a story needs, or a character needs. I want my characters to be real, to be relatable, to be free to have whatever views they tell me they have. And trust me, most of the time, I do not have any say in the matter!
My characters come to life on the page for me as well as my readers. Their stories unfold in front of me, and I have very little input into how they want to be shown. Just like real life, the lives of my characters change with every choice, every interaction and every conversation. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
I write books that are emotionally realistic, even if liberties are taken with other aspects of my stories. I don’t know any other way to write. It comes from deep inside.
Who am I? A single parent to two children who make life worth living. An avid reader who still devours every book she can get her hands on. A student of learning about any subject that takes her fancy. An author of books she would read herself. And a romantic at heart who loves anything cheesy.
Who’s in?
Andrew Grey is the author of over 100 works of Contemporary Gay Romantic fiction. After twenty-seven years in corporate America, he has now settled down in Central Pennsylvania with his husband, Dominic, and his laptop. An interesting ménage. Andrew grew up in western Michigan with a father who loved to tell stories and a mother who loved to read them. Since then he has lived throughout the country and traveled throughout the world.
He is a recipient of the RWA Centennial Award, has a master’s degree from the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee, and now writes full-time. Andrew’s hobbies include collecting antiques, gardening, and leaving his dirty dishes anywhere but in the sink (particularly when writing). He considers himself blessed with an accepting family, fantastic friends, and the world’s most supportive and loving partner. Andrew currently lives in beautiful, historic Carlisle, Pennsylvania.
Lacey lives in New Mexico with her four critters. She’s a Jill-of-all-trades by day, but loves writing in her spare time. She dabbles in a variety of pairings, but jumped feet-first into the deep end of omegaverse the first time she read it. She loves the play on social expectations and the different ways to express romance.
Barbara Elsborg
EMAIL: bjelsborg@gmail.com
Nora Phoenix
Eloise East
EMAIL: eloise@eloiseeast.com
Andrew Grey
Where Forever Started by Barbara Elsborg
No Angel by Nora Phoenix
A Crush for Christmas by Eloise East
Rudolph the Rescue Jack Russell by Andrew Grey
KOBO / iTUNES / GOOGLE PLAY
Peppermint Kisses for the Omega by Lacey Daize
No comments:
Post a Comment